[VIDEO] - [Private to Party Poison]

[onteamdyson]

[Kenzi turns on the camera as she reaches the top of the stairs. It shows a lovely sideways view of Sherlock's attic.]

Hey, Fluffy! How's it gooooing? You look very forgiving and reasonable today! I got a message for you. SO! Remember the dude that cut up your arm and junk? Great dude, right? Yeah. He says 'Blow me.'

[And then she waits for the inevitable face-punch.]

[Sherlock is visible in profile a few feet away as the feed begins, and as Kenzi continues he progresses through a series of stages. The first is annoyance, which is typical – nearly everybody annoys him, and Kenzi particularly so, most days. The second is equanimity, a settling of features into something which looks suspiciously as though he's doing his level best to ignore her. The final comes after Kenzi's last comment, the message to be delivered, and consists of the raising of an eyebrow.]

Hmm? Oh, not interested. Was that it?

................................................................... yep. That's it. If there's more, I'll keep you updated?

[And she is fucking OUT OF THERE. Not one scratch or verbal face-shattering. Damn. It was actually pretty freakin' disappointing. She smiles into the camera on her way out.]  A deal's a deal. Meet you at the bar!





**Blue is Sherlock Holmes.

Comments

[gloryisbullshit]

Lame! [He booes.] All his fuckin talk, and that's it! Whatever. What're you drinkin, I'll organize that shit stat.

[onteamdyson]

Hey, I'm just the messenger. Think of something better next time. Fifty points for NOTHING. Frig yes.

Vodka-filled anything. Leave the bottle.

[gloryisbullshit]

Fuck youuuuu. Aqui, aqui, hurry that ass up. I'm already here.

[onteamdyson]

Keep your ridiculously tight pants on! I can't run and gloat.

[So she lets her arm drop and heads the hell over there. It's not too far, and you can bet your ass she is opening that door by kicking it. See? Tough. Tough and not scared...

anymore.]

Your face looks even girlier than the last time I saw it.

[gloryisbullshit]

What? [He scowls at her as she comes in, peeking up from behind the bar.] How girly was it last time?

[And he rises to drop a cherry in--that's right--just a tumbler full of vodka. Hope u liek cocktails.]

[onteamdyson]

On a scale of one to tampon, you were a pink nail polish. You just moved up to a frilly skirt. [She sits in front of said drink... stares at it... and looks like she's about to choke up.]

It's beautiful.

[Okay, she might just be missing her bar-tending succu-bff just a little, but hey. P's fucking entertaining.]

[gloryisbullshit]

[We weren't exactly going for art with tonight's drinks. Party is nursing something brown, curled in against his shoulder. He also has a cherry because he is a classy dude.] I had to use my feminine wiles a bunch lately. Figure my body's like...acclimating.

[onteamdyson]

[Cherries are classy AND delicious. She takes hers out of the drink and eats it before legit downing a quarter of the glass. Minimal wincing. Severely missing the green shit from the Dal, but whatevs. Drunk is drunk and that's the goal here.]

... Do I want to know on who and for what? If you got something shiny, you gotta share! Law of the land.

[gloryisbullshit]

Fuck land law. [He sneers immediately. Touchy!] There is no land law, if we're gonna fucking live in nowhere land, we oughta live in like--peaceful anarchy. I don't give a shit about your laws. You see this bitch on the comms? About the doctors? [Mina. Just recently!]

[onteamdyson]

[OH MY GOD Party calm down. She grabs a napkin from the dispenser, opens it all up, and drapes it over his head like how you cover birds up when they freak the shit out.]

Wh-- bossy chick, short hair, talking about CHAIN OF COMMAND? Yeah, no thanks. How do we even know she's a real doctor? She probably just wants to see everyone naked. Avoiding that shit like the plaaaague.

[gloryisbullshit]

What--Kenzi! [What are you doing, get this stupid thing off his face! He swipes it away, bunches it up in his palm.] Tchyeah, fuckin--you know her? Everyone here's like fuckin buddies, you know her?

[onteamdyson]

Nope! Not even a little. Pretty sure we have never spoken and if she's gonna be demanding medical checks, we never will.

[It's bad enough she had to tell Bruce about the thing.]

[gloryisbullshit]

[He snorts over his glass.] Tell you what, if I gotta waste wiles on getting outta that, I'm gonna be pissed. [A drink, and then:] Doctor Banner. You think he takes wiles?

[onteamdyson]

Bruce? Bruce is fucking AWESOME! I think his sasstacular sassness is gonna counter any wiles, but I'd take him over bossypants any day of the week. Bruce is cool. He keeps things on the down low. Pretty sure he's also slowly learning to speak Kenzi... [She grins and sips at her purevodkatini. S-smooth.]

[gloryisbullshit]

Yeah. [Party agrees, in the greatest show of mildness he's probably ever displayed.] Yeah, he's alright.

[You know what, what if he just brings the jar of cherries up to the counter, that seems like a good idea. Even while he plucks one out to eat, he scowls at it:] Everything's so fucking sweet here. I got a stomachache like a thousand percent of the time, this is bullshit. Is this how people live?

[onteamdyson]

... People don't usually survive on cocktail freakin' cherries, dude. You need a balanced diet. Eat a pickle. Or like... eggs. With salt. [Because eggs are totally the opposite of sugar. MORE DRINKING. Why the hell had it taken her so long to check out the bar?] You got a tummy ache right noooow? Awh, poor babyface angelbutt cuddlelumps. Want some warm milk?!

[gloryisbullshit]

No. No fuckin milk, I'm so sicka milk, it makes it worse. This fucking sucks. [He glares at her, but it doesn't have all that much venom.] I'm--it's fine right now. Angelbutt? [NOT THAT IT ISN'T ACCURATE, BUT STILL.]

[onteamdyson]

In honour of your angelic butt? What the hell is wrong with angelbutt?! It's flattering.

[Just gonna push her now-empty glass closer and closer to him until he gets the incredibly subtle hint.]

Okay, what do you want to eat? I could go for a cheesy, cheesy pizza but that's not gonna happen. Unless it's from freezerland.

[gloryisbullshit]

[He winces at "cheesy, cheesy pizza" and dumps the jar of cherries in her glass. Fuck your hints.] I don't wanna eat anything. Every time I--every time I eat I feel sick. [What, he's not blushing, this isn't silly at all.]

[onteamdyson]

[DUDE! So much frowning. But the angry frowning turns to mildly concerned frowning.]

... How long has this been going on? Is this why you're freaked about mandatory med-checks? [At the risk of bodily harm, she kneels on the bar stool and reaches over the bar to feel his forehead with the back of her hand.]

[gloryisbullshit]

[Hi, no! His head jerks back from her hand and he bites at her fingers (not on her fingers, because SOME people in this family have boundaries, ha ha).] Stop! I don't wanna be checked cuz fuck mandatory, I get hives if I even think about mandatory, it's such a crockload and we all know Dr. Do-It is sketch out the ass, right?

[onteamdyson]

Holyshit! [Okay, well she didn't know he wasn't actually going to bite and he's right back to scary again as she pulls her fucking hand back, goddamn. Wide-eyed nodding.] Right.

But dude, you gotta eat. Maybe your stomach... shrunk. Or something. From not having a constant food supply. And you gotta get used to eating again! Or maybe you're homesick! Want me to draw you a cactus?

[Also excuse her, drinking a fucking mouthful of cherries.]

[gloryisbullshit]

I'm eating, right? I'm--pfhehe. [Drinking cherries. He gets his own drink down before reaching for the vodka he put in her glass before.] Put it down. Put it. Here. [Another inch or so to give the remaining fruit something to float in.] You wanna make me at home, get me a fuckin--car, man. A road, or--or my gun. Fuck.

[He sets the bottle down, palm rubbing where he usually sets his holster.]

[onteamdyson]

Uuuuuuuuuugh, it's so cool that you guys get freakin' LASER GUNS in the future. How even-- KK said if he had his gun and I had my sword we could see if the beams bounce off like in Star Wars. I don't blame you for missing that. They sound awesome. [Siiiiip.] Cars are tough. I'd lend you the big, yellow piece of junk if I knew which way Canada was.

[gloryisbullshit]

[Sip, snicker.] Canadian? For real?