cape_kore | Bruce Banner | 001

Hi. My name's Bruce Banner. I'm a doctor and a scientist. Not to flood everyone with information or to alarm anyone, I feel like I need to say a few things.

If you could gather up the medicine you find in your house and bring it to the pharmacy in the middle of the town, that'd be appreciated. You're welcome to keep a small supply of your typical things, like aspirin, but it'd be a good idea to centralize everything else.

Clearly whoever was living here left in a hurry. Keep an eye on yourselves for signs of illness, including radiation sickness, in case there was a biological reason for the evacuation. Nausea and vomiting are going to be your first indicators that something could be wrong radiation-wise.

I could make a Geiger counter or something similar to test the radiation levels, but I need some electronic parts, and I can't seem to find any except for these cameras. And I don't really recommend taking those apart unless you like getting electrocuted and blacking out.

[That had been fun, and by fun he means he was incredibly grateful that he hadn't Hulked out.]

If you find any parts that don't give you a shocking experience, could we share?

Um... Keep calm and carry on. [But no really, he hopes they can avoid some The Monsters are Due on Maple Street style panic.]

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Yeah, I just didn't think it would be relevant. But then, you are older than the average male. [She wrinkles her nose at him, helping to set everything out before growing serious.]

I'm... okay. I'm in the attic of one of the houses - thought it would help with the spying and all. Turns out, whatever bastards put us here can fit in the attic.

Which shouldn't be a surprise, since I got a mattress up there.

And they were old people, too. So if ever you need a backlog of stuff for the past seventy years, be it holiday decorations or old photographs, I'm your girl.

Thankfully I'm not into catheter territory yet, but as soon as I am, I'll give you a call.

Want to trade? The second bedroom of mine is a nursery. Baby things everywhere. [It's depressing, and he hasn't actually gone into it much, but he figures he'll have to clean it out sometime.]

Don't give me a call, just come over and pick it up. Bring bleach so I can clean up after it.

[That... doesn't sound like the most cheerful thing ever.]

Bruce. I'm confused. Are you saying you want me to wear baby clothes? Or live in a nursery?

You seem pretty young, but not that young. No, I just... [He shakes his head.] Nevermind. I like my house. It's hermity.

Have you seen that lighthouse over there? Maybe we still get ships passing by.

Maybe we should set something on fire to get their attention.

So you actually like living on your own with a bunch of old baby stuff?

Relative to living in the woods, sure. I'll take teddy bears over actual bears any day.

[From her lack of change in expression, she doesn't seem to believe that he ever lived in the woods.]

Did you steal picnic baskets, Yogi?

Were they full of sweet, sweet antibiotics?

[Oh, good. Though he guesses he could've passed that off as some kind of nature experience foisted on him in college, or the result of some zany third world volunteering mishap.]

What kind of picnics do you go to? You should cut back on those, or you'll ruin yourself for penicillin forever.

I go to really fun picnics, Bruce. Prescription pills and beer. [And roofies, naturally.]

How do you think I keep such a slim figure? Two words. Flintstone vitamins.

[Her levity quickly fades as she leans against the counter, though.] So they still have no idea how to get out of here, I guess.

Usually I don't recommend that Flintstone vitamins be taken with beer, but that's usually because the patients in question aren't two whole hands old yet.

[His does too, and he shakes his head, reaching up to rub a hand over his stubble.]

Not yet. We're working on it, but there's a lot we aren't sure of yet. How and why we were brought here, is one. Once we find the road in, we can hopefully follow it back out, but...

So... that group you're with. They're helping to organize stuff, right? Any chance they'd let me do something? I mean, a normal kidnapping, I'd have this taken care of by now. Asses kicked and in jail. But... I'm not really used to being kidnapped in Salem, Massachusetts.

[She picks up one of the pill bottles and looks over the label.] It's kind of...

Well, I'm not used to feeling useless. There's gotta be something I can do, right? I used to do the paperwork for my dad's business, if that helps.

[He respects her a lot for not freaking out and for wanting to pitch in like this, and it makes Bruce sit up and pay a little more attention. She's young, but in this situation, are they really going to tell someone to come back when they're old enough to vote? Not that he even knows if she's 18, but the principle's the same.]

I can't see anyone turning away a helping hand right now, especially one that likes to do paperwork. I'll ask, both my group and the other doctors. At the moment we don't have a lot going on beyond cataloging our supplies, but if we ever need a filing assistant or something, we'll know who to call.

[Oh, she'll freak out. She's just processing still.]

Wow. So you're telling me that you'll brush me off for now, but not for forever because you'll have paperwork nobody will want to do.

[She sighs and shrugs.] I can do that.

[He laughs, shaking his head.] No, I just meant I don't have that much work to pawn off onto someone else right now. Not brushing you off.

You sure? I mean, I wouldn't take it personally if you did.

[She shrugs.] It's just boring around here. And idle hands are my workshop. Or the devil's. Did I say "my?" Yipes. I meant the devil's. Yeah. [She holds up her hands and wiggles her fingers.]

Bruce Banner | 001 | Video

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