001 ➳ Video ➳ Clint Barton

[greatatboats]

[ They got crap like this in SHIELD, but that doesn't mean Clint paid much mind to it. Unless it was his tech then he had no reason to really be interested in understanding it. The eggheads were all supposed to handle that crap. Clint was strictly a grunt when it came down to it. Learning to use this communicator that's strapped to his wrist is like the Quinjet training. Frustrating and just plain stupid.

He's managed to get distracted while waiting on the feed to come to life. That's why he doesn't really notice when it flicks on. He's busying checking his teeth over. He gives a startled expression when he realizes the thing has somehow come to life. ] Stark, I swear on all that is good and holy--if this is your doing then I'm going to sick Natasha on you when you least expect her. [ Because he's more than aware that Natasha Romanoff is far more scarier to Tony Stark than Clint Barton will ever be.

Fuck. This practical joke is not nearly as funny as the ones that Clint cooks up back at SHIELD HQ. Clint wasn't normally a tattle tell, but Fury was gonna hear about this. Clint was in the middle of important business when things went fuzzy. Now he was in the middle of fucking nowhere and his arrows weren't labeled. Great. Someone will pay with push ups and ass kissing.

By now he's no longer paying attention to the communicator. He's desperately searching around him to find something even remotely familiar. His eyes fix on a point in the distance. His arm shifts up and the communicator catches a clear glimpse of his bow strapped to his body and the quiver on his back. ] This is stupid.

Comments

[greatatboats]

[ Clint's completely gong to disregard the stupid comment because this guy has just called Tony--Mister Stark. A laugh erupts from the archer as he bows his head. ] Did he instruct you guys to call him that? Typical. [ He's completely forgotten this is a stranger. It's just too funny. ]

[gloryisbullshit]

He did, actually. Fuckin prick.

So you're Clint. Clint like Barton, Clint. Clint like Hawkeye, Clint.

[greatatboats]

That is exactly what I say. Him and that stupid facial hair monstrosity that he calls--[ Ready for some air quotes? ] classy. It's gross looking.

[ Clint takes a breath and a second to look around once more. His gaze falls back down to the communicator. ] Yeah, but without as many likes. Did I become internet famous again? You're involved in one sex tape and suddenly--

[gloryisbullshit]

All it take is one, mama. Might as well take advantage, though. Long as yer gonna be here a while--and you are gonna be here a while--you can start on your line of scents.

[greatatboats]

[ Being called mama definitely makes Clint purse his lips. He'll roll with it though. Different strokes for different folks. He's not one to hate--unless your name is Tony Stark. ] I don't know what that even means.

[gloryisbullshit]

Sex tape? Famous for no reason? ...Fashion line, perfu--know what, nah, nevermind, not worth it. So you don't remember shit, I figure, huh?

[greatatboats]

[ He's disoriented. It's not everyday you wake up in a bullshit version of wonderland and are expected to be good. Forgive him for not catching the Kardashian and Hilton reference. He's tired. ] Not really? Apparently people seem to remember me. Which is weird because I'm not supposed to be the one you remember. Maybe they did something--

[gloryisbullshit]

No shit, they did something! What's that even mean--"not supposed to be the one"?

[greatatboats]

Government operations. Kinda work in the shadows type. I'm not exactly the guy you get to know. Apparently though before I left the first time I was a big blabbermouth and told everyone everything.