Gabriel - Video - 02

[hung_garian]

You can all quit freaking out over The Box now. After painstaking investigation, I can reveal that it contains - a cat. It's simultaneously alive and dead. Hence all the funny scratches - if you ever tried getting your feline friend into a carrier, you'll know what I mean. Claws are not fun, kids, no matter what Whitesnake say. And that goes double for the undead kitty kind. Unhygienic on top of painful, double ouch.

[Needless to say, Gabriel is bored. Also needless to say (hopefully), none of that was true.]

So since that's all sorted out, who likes the idea of celebratory drinks? Sure, we might not technically have a bar, but where there's life there's booze, as my dear old gran used to say. Well, before she got packed off to rehab, anyway.

[He grimaces, despite not even having a grandmother.]

Anyway. Takers? Ladies, don't be shy. Doctor Barrett, that means you too, awful drinking habits notwithstanding.

Comments

[theshield_agent]

Amen.

[He picks up the other one, tipping it slightly towards Gabriel and taking a drink. If he's going to die either way, he's going to save lives with his death, not just die here in some mystery shack.]

So does that mean I'm going to hit pass-out-drunk before you even get tipsy?

[hung_garian]

Probably. It's not easy being me.

[Cue dramatic sigh, and an even more dramatic swig of whiskey. He grimaces.]

Manly bonding drinks are just gross.

[As whiskey goes, it's actually not that bad. He's considering pouring sugar into it anyway.]

Why don't they just make strawberry flavoured whiskey or something?

[theshield_agent]

You should probably just go with something other than whiskey. I don't think those flavors are going to mix well.

[Phil is well on his way to being drunk. With everything that's happening, who can blame him, really?]

Not that I think whiskey tastes good, either.

[hung_garian]

True.

[He makes a face at the drink, as if it'll be intimidated or guilted into changing into something less... well, less like whiskey. It isn't. He downs it - easier said than done, really, should've had smaller portions. Or maybe not, since it's hardly going to make much difference to a metabolism like his.]

D'you reckon they make them taste like this so you have to drink them faster?

[theshield_agent]

[Phil snorts.]

I think it's actually the opposite, but it does usually just lead to shots. Not to mention the fact that once you're already drunk, it starts to taste, well, less bad.

[hung_garian]

If you're drunk, you don't need any more whiskey.

[His glass refills itself with something unnervingly blue, which he sips much more happily.]

I s'pose it's one of those masochistic things people do to prove how tough they are. Or out of the endearing but kind of weird belief that if something's gross and slightly painful it'll probably do you good. Either way, I think I'm happy with not being tough, and I don't need to be done any more good, so... I think I'll stick with the stuff that tastes like artificial sweeteners.

[theshield_agent]

No, no, no. There are different levels to drunk.

[And Phil is starting to hit the earlier ones. This is a lot of whiskey.]

Sometimes you are drunk, but you still want to be more drunk and it's not about macho bullshit or anything. It's about... it's about forgetting your worries and being able to finally turn off all the whirring in your head from work. Then you feel warm and pass out.

[hung_garian]

[That's Gabriel's aim here. Getting strangers drunk is fun.]

I know why people get drunk. I mean, hello, Viking. Can't say I understand the passing out, but hey, if that's what floats your boat, who am I to judge. That's the AA's job.

[theshield_agent]

Oh, I'm not an alcoholic. You want to meet an alcoholic? Find Tony Stark.

[He takes another long drink.]

Or don't. You probably don't deserve that.

[hung_garian]

I know enough alcoholics already. Fun though playing barman is, I don't need my primary role here to be trying to wrestle bottles off of drunks while they sob on my sofa.

[And the chaos that could ensue from Tony and Gabriel meeting would probably be horrific.]

[theshield_agent]

[Phil smiles. He doesn't really hate Stark. He just wants to smack him in the face sometimes. It's a perfectly reasonable response. He'd probably be pretty useful here, actually. Thor, too.]

Crying drunks are the worst. I wouldn't want to deal with them, either. I like getting drunk with Natasha. She just stares at you and leaves you to figure out what she's thinking. Mostly, I wind up just laughing, though.

[hung_garian]

Good. You get all weepy and I'm kicking you out, don't think I won't.

[theshield_agent]

Lucky for you I hit sleepy drunk way before I hit emotional drunk. I guess I'm just well-adjusted.

[hung_garian]

Which makes you something of a rarity in this place. Lucky for you, I'm not the type to do mean things to sleeping drunks, like draw penises on their face or see how many things I can put on 'em before they wake up.

[Why does that sound like a lie?]

[theshield_agent]

[Phil chuckles.]

I was in the Army. 'S not like I've never had a dick Sharpied on my face. As long as you're not going to shoot me, we're good.

[hung_garian]

Course not. It'd make such a mess on my sofa.

[theshield_agent]

Well, as long as you've got some good reasons not to.

[Of course, Phil's already somewhat tired. This place is tiring and the alcohol isn't helping.]

[hung_garian]

It's only one so far, but I'm sure I can think up another if I really put my mind to it.

[theshield_agent]

[Phil hums in agreement, eyes closing for a moment.]

It's hard to believe you're somehow analogous with the Loki from my world. You think your world would be up for a trade?

[hung_garian]

I'm sure of it. Let me know if you figure out how.

[theshield_agent]

[And Phil's already half-asleep in the chair before he can answer.]

[hung_garian]

[BORING.

Gabriel spends a few minutes glaring at him for having the ~nerve, but that gets boring too. Honestly, how do these idiots not realise it's their role in life to entertain him?

He settles for pretending Phil's not even there, and goes about his business as usual. Luckily for him, business as usual isn't particularly noisy. Or, at least tonight, not particularly traumatic.]