006 || Sharon Carter || [video]

[agentx13]

Has anyone seen or heard from Natasha Romanoff? Bright red hair. Can't miss her, except for how she has a twin from another universe. If you've seen either one, please tell me immediately.

Private to Natalia
Wherever the hell you are, check in now.

Private to Coulson
My Natasha didn't hasn't been home for the last couple of days. Any chance yours can help find her?

Comments

[manofiron]

So what affects one person affects all of them even if they're from different worlds or universes or whatever?

[ That's kind of alarming. And good to know. ]

I'll look for them both.

[agentx13]

We don't know that yet, but it's a possibility.

[She rubs her temples.] When I find the people who kidnapped us...

[manofiron]

You and me both. I have a bone to pick with them too.

I find anything that points to their whereabouts, I'll let you know about that as well.

[agentx13]

I suspect there might be enough for all of us to get a hit or two in.

Thanks, Stark. No offense, but you're... more helpful than I thought you'd be. I'm surprised. In a good way.

[manofiron]

I hope so. You steal all the fun, I'm gonna be upset.

Kind of a dick where you're from, huh? I'm not surprised. I've been called worse where I'm from, too. It's okay. It's a work in progress.

[agentx13]

[To say he's a dick where she comes from is putting it lightly.]

What did you do back home for you to be called names? I know Coulson and Hawkeye have almost completely different lives where they're from.

[manofiron]

Well, I'm me. That usually seems to be reason enough.

What are they like? The Coulson and Hawkeye that you know?

[agentx13]

[She turns her head and smiles slyly.]

You want dirt on them? From back home? Stuff to rub in their faces here?

[manofiron]

Actually, I'm just curious. Alternate dimensions are a theory where I'm from, not a fact. Learning about them, how the people and places are different and why, call it fascination.

[agentx13]

I call it gossip.

But all right. I'll tell you a couple things. Barton married Bobbi Morse, but the marriage fell apart, and now he's with another woman. He and Bobbi are still on good terms, though, and she doesn't approve of the new woman. As for Coulson, he's bff's with Nick Fury's son.

[manofiron]

Bobbi? Not Natasha? I could've sworn...

[ Well, what does he know? He can't even maintain a relationship of his own. ]

Doesn't surprise me about Coulson. What does surprise me is that someone would have a kid with Fury. What poor woman fell for that?

[agentx13]

Nah, those two are close, but not like that. [She shrugs.] My world, Natasha was using Barton at first, back when she was still with the other side. But Barton was a good guy and eventually he and Natasha got over it. Broke up, but still close.

She was actually a pretty commendable woman. She was a spy, too. Gave it up to raise the kid.

So... are you attending AA?

[manofiron]

I don't...

[ That's a lie. He does have a drinking problem. He knows it. Like father, like son, though his way of coping is to get maudlin and depressed, not nasty and abusive. ]

Seriously? AA? Did I move to New Jersey, too? Am I flipping burgers at--Romanoff has a kid?

[agentx13]

[She stares at him for a second and then bursts out laughing. It's been a long time since she laughed like that, and she sobers quickly.]

No, no. The woman Fury had the kid with. Natasha doesn't have kids. [She's not even sure Natasha can have kids.]

And yeah, you flip burgers at McDonald's. Steve goes by once a week and you always give him extra fries without having to be asked.

[manofiron]

[ With Tony, laughter tends to be contagious. His lips quirk and he almost joins in. It's never hurt him to laugh at himself. ]

That's good. I don't think the world's prepared for Romanoff juniors running around, terrorizing the populace.

Not so good about the burger flipping, though. That's a new low for me. I think maybe someone ought to stage an intervention and get the poor guy some help.

[agentx13]

Oh, no. That wasn't the low for you.

The low for you came when you decided to try that beard. [She grins. Even she can tease people when conditions are right.]

[manofiron]

Clearly, you've never seen me without it.

[ He can't even pretend to take offense to that. ]

[agentx13]

Have you ever been without it? Even back home, you had that thing on your face. You're like a facial Donald Trump.

[manofiron]

Okay. You got me. I was born with it.

[ He rolls his eyes. ]

I can't believe you just compared me to Trump. That's just rude.

[agentx13]

But fitting. That... creature is as much as marketing tool as Trump's combover.

[manofiron]

It's not a creature. It's a goatee. You talk about it like it has a mind of its own.

[agentx13]

I never meant to imply that.

But it has moved since we started talking.

[manofiron]

Your wit is astounding, Sharon. I'm speechless before it.

[agentx13]

Stark, speechless. Miracles do happen.

[manofiron]

How is it that I didn't fire you when I was your boss?