003 | Tony Stark | Audio

[manofiron]

[ Normally Tony would ramble on for a while, but he’s a busy guy lately and he really doesn’t have the patience to beat around the bush. ]

Not to rain on the gluttony parade, but does anyone else question trusting manna from heaven – figuratively speaking – after the whole “drug our air with hallucinogens” incident? Or is that just me being paranoid?

Comments

[hung_garian]

I hate that guy.

[Mostly because Gabriel is the ragequitting type.]

[manofiron]

Everybody does. But somebody's always gotta be him, right?

[hung_garian]

You martyr, you.

[manofiron]

My burden's a heavy one, what can I say?

[hung_garian]

Poor thing. I'd try dumping it on someone else if I were you. Best problem solving method there is. Well - second. Beaten by a joint first of sex and alcohol.

[manofiron]

I think I could see my way to ditching the tragic life of a hero and indulging in neverending hedonism. Or, you know, getting drunk and laid all the time. That'd be fine.

[hung_garian]

That's the spirit! See, it's not all doom and gloom.

[manofiron]

Tell you what. Next orgy I host, you're invited.

[hung_garian]

A veritable Bacchus, huh? You're too kind.

[manofiron]

Depends which version we're going with. The lean, handsome one, sure. The short, rotund one, not so much.

[hung_garian]

Oh, the handsome one, naturally. Otherwise I imagine the orgies would be a little trickier to arrange.

[manofiron]

Well, since I've been named in practically every magazine's version of the Sexiest Man Alive contest, I think I can say I fit that bill.

[hung_garian]

Pretty and modest, always a winning combination.

[manofiron]

What can I say, I come from a winning lineage.

[hung_garian]

Lemme guess, your old man's topped every DILF chart there is for the past thirty years?

[manofiron]

If he was still alive, answer'd probably be yes.

[hung_garian]

[Hm. Could be sensitive about this. Or...]

Well, if the decomposition hasn't got to his face yet, he might still be in with a chance.

[manofiron]

[ Tony doesn't know how to do sensitive when talking about his father. There are just far too many issues. ]

It's getting close to thirty years. If decomposition hasn't set in yet, he's a vampire, and that's its own set of problems that I really don't want to deal with.

[hung_garian]

Well, here's hoping he's not, or he'll have had a very boring few decades stuck underground.

[manofiron]

Or he built an underground city that's about twice as advanced as the one above ground.

[hung_garian]

And about a million times more discreet. But hey, you never know.

[manofiron]

I'm hoping for dead. We'll go with dead.

[hung_garian]

If he ever turns up here, I'm telling him you said that.

[manofiron]

You go right ahead. Hell, I'll probably say it myself.

[hung_garian]

[World-weary sigh goes here.]

All the attractive ones have daddy issues, huh?