004 | Tony Stark | Video

[manofiron]

[ Although he’s not exactly smiling, Tony’s expression is blandly neutral, relaxed, and his voice is friendly. ]

Normally I’d have my assistant – I guess technically she’s my CEO now - handle the whole public relations thing, but she’s not here so I guess that leaves me doing it myself. Unless I have a volunteer from the audience? No? Didn’t think so.

[ He glances away from the camera for a second, almost like he’s looking at a list. ]

Stiles, I got your bow and arrows here. Any time you want me to stop by and get them, feel free. Alternatively, I can be persuaded to play delivery guy.

Sharon. You wanted some new toys? I got a couple for you.

Party Poison. Not to be confused with the lovely Poison Ivy. We have a bet, right?

[ Twisting his wrist, the video blurs and comes into focus on a large sabertooth tiger reclining on the living room floor like he owns the place. At the attention, he lifts his head, flattens his ears, and lazily bares his teeth. The video blurs again, coming to rest on Tony’s face, who’s utterly unfazed by being threatened by hundreds of pounds of formerly extinct cat. ]

Meet Stanley. And start the countdown.

[ Flashing a smile, he starts to lower his wrist, then pauses and lifts it back. ]

Oh, right. And one more thing before I forget.

[ Anyone who knows Tony might know better here. Might realize that he wasn’t going to forget and has in fact been building up to this the entire time he’s been talking. ]

“Hot Hands.” [ He even makes the air quotes with his free hand as he smiles, like everything’s all friendly like. Much like Stanley, though, it’s really a baring of his teeth. ] Listen. If you touch Bruce again, I’ll break them. And then my big green friend won’t have to show up to beat your ass into the ground. Capiche?

Comments

[manofiron]

Right now, I think hand breaking's on hold until the second infraction.

The cat, though. That's... Security precautions. We need them, right? So I went with what's available. Big ass sabertooth cats scare the shit out of us, I figure they'd do it to our enemies, too.

[ He smiles just a little at that last. ]

Will do. I'm sure he'll appreciate it.

[thelittlestbub]

Well, poot. I haven't been able to do a good hard intimidation in forever.

[She pouts, but then wrinkles her nose.]

Well, yes, but... Damn, I can't even fault that logic despite the, ya know, sabretooth cat you've got in your house.

[She shrugs, smiling back.]

Hey, I'm the last one to criticize anyone for their issues.

[manofiron]

No one can fault my logic. It's impeccable. Most of the time.

[ When he's sober. ]

He's not even much of an issue. The Hulk's a good guy. He's just, he's learning. There's bound to be a stumble here and there.

[thelittlestbub]

Ya know, pride goeth and all that.

[Except she finds comfort in Tony's cockiness.]

Admittedly, I only have peripheral dealings with the Hulk, and watching on TV and stuff. Never actually met him face to face. So, I'll trust your assessment.

[manofiron]

Falling's not really my thing. I prefer flying.

[ And everything else that doesn't involve falling. ]

You just have to know how to talk to the guy. I'll give you a hint. It's just like talking to anyone else.

[thelittlestbub]

Me too. Unfortunately, no one here to take me. That makes me sad.

[Warren, Rogue, Ro... HOMESICK.]

Like I said, never met him. But if it's anything like talking to Logan, I'm an expert. Some of the time.

[manofiron]

Join the clipped wings club. I haven't been since I got here either.

I haven't spoken to him much. Logan, I mean. I don't know if there's a parallel or not.

[thelittlestbub]

... I wonder. Ya know, you should be nice to me, because if I'm remembering rightly, there might be a way to go flying soon. I've gotta work out some deets though.

[Magneto's here. That could prove advantageous.]

Wolvie's the good sort. Not the nice sort, but the good sort.

[manofiron]

Only kind of flying I need's my kind and that requires the suit.

[ Which he can't make with the limited resources available. ]

I know a few of those. From what conversations we've had, he seems decent.

[thelittlestbub]

Unfortunately, compromise, Stark. I'd love to see you in the suit, but, well, compromise.

[And she'd ask to go flying, because... well, flying.]

Saved my spastic butt more than once. Of course, I've reciprocated a couple of times.

[manofiron]

That's what friends do, right? Pull each other's ass out of the fire when it gets too hot.

[thelittlestbub]

They do. They do.

[Family too.]

[manofiron]

Well, I'll let Bruce know he's got another one.