Gabriel | Video | 05 | Day 53

[hung_garian]

I see a lot of you kind people have been signing up for extracurriculars. Scouting, hunting, washing the dishes, all that sort of thing. Buuuuuut, I couldn't help noticing a bit of a gap in these activities, which I brought to the attention of our fearless leader and got his permission to fill! Sort of. Our little town is so lucky to have such a devoted mayor. Three cheers for ol' what's-his-face, et cetera.

[It's almost all true. The permission bit isn't, predictably, but the guy hadn't forbidden it. Not in as many words, at least... and not that that would stop Gabriel.]

So, uh, anyone willing to make the ultimate sacrifice and join me in testing the safety of the chocolate, alcohol and bedsprings, possibly all at the same time... sign up here. I know, I know -- I'm not saying it'll be easy. Hells, I'm not even saying any of us'll make it out alive. But those of you prepared to give your all in the service of your gilded cage and your fellow vacationers, you'll be doing the right thing. You'll be remembered as heroes.

[Needless to say, he's bored. Somebody entertain him before he takes up serial murder again...]

Comments

[Action]

[hung_garian]

Yep. Chemicals and sugar and maybe just a hint of plastic.

[Action]

[servingmichael]

And you like these things?

[Judging you so hard bro.]

[Action]

[hung_garian]

Love 'em. Kali once tried to get me to go to a support group. I told her the alcoholics'd think I was taking the piss and beat the crap out of me, but apparently that was the idea.

[Is he joking? The world may never know.]

[Action]

[servingmichael]

You're strange.

[Action]

[hung_garian]

So I've been told.

[Action]

[servingmichael]

Does all of it taste this badly?

[Action]

[hung_garian]

There's different flavours. Varying quantities and types of chemicals, that sort of thing. Do you really care?

[Action]

[servingmichael]

I'm trying to understand why people like it so much.

[Action]

[hung_garian]

Well, don't force yourself. More for me.

[Action]

[servingmichael]

I wouldn't.

[Though he doesn't just chuck the thing away either.]

[Action]

[hung_garian]

[He appreciates the gesture. He thinks.]

So - you done? I can find some more food for you to stare at quizzically if you're still curious.

[Action]

[servingmichael]

Can you find something that doesn't taste like chemicals?

[Action]

[hung_garian]

Well, technically speaking I suppose everything tastes like chemicals.

[Or does it? He's terrible at keeping track of modern scientific theories.]

Suppose I could. Tell you what, I'll send you a fruit basket. Only, uh, with nice stuff instead of fruit. Where you staying?

[Action]

[servingmichael]

I'm not staying anywhere, actually. I don't need to.

[So what was the point?]

[Action]

[hung_garian]

Then I guess you won't be getting that candy basket.

[Action]

[servingmichael]

Why do you?

[He didn't understand this playing at human bit.]

[Action]

[hung_garian]

Well, the ladies aren't too impressed if you take 'em home to the woods. Helps to have a flat surface that's not covered in bugs and leaves.

[He waggles his eyebrows.]

Anyway, there's not enough space here to keep wandering around 24/7 - you have to stay someplace sometime, and houses? Typically pretty good places to do that.

[Action]

[servingmichael]

[ Who knew Raphael could make such an ew face?

Because he really manages it. ]

I don't mind being outside. But if I'm talking with the mortals I do tend to be inside.

[Action]

[hung_garian]

[He's impressed!]

See? Might as well have a comfy antechamber to intimidate the little meatbags in, instead of having to crash their house every time. It's terribly bad etiquette to smite someone in their own house, you know, especially if you don't bring a bottle of wine or a fruit basket.

[Action]

[servingmichael]

I don't crash in their homes. Well. Chuck I did, but I didn't harm him.

[ For a technical definition of harm. ]

[Action]

[hung_garian]

[He shrugs.]

Chuck lives with us, last I checked. It doesn't count as crashing when it's our house.

[Note how subtly he manages not to say outright that as far as he's concerned, Raphael has an open invitation to House 11.]

[Action]

[servingmichael]

He does.

[ Raphael kept a close watch. ]

But that is good to know.

[Action] Woops, html.

[hung_garian]

Yep. If you want the adrenaline kick of breaking and entering, you'll have to try somewhere else.

[Action] happens!

[servingmichael]

I wanted an adrenaline kick, I'd simply smack our older brother in the back of the head.

[ Raphael's sense of adventure is a little off. ]

[Action]

[hung_garian]

[He winces - only slightly, but it's obvious nonetheless.]

Uh, speaking just from experience here? Really wouldn't recommend that.