fifth ( video ) day 65

[gleans]

[ Galen isn't on camera for long, but when he is, he looks like shit; tired, raw, and maybe a little drunk. It's been a terrible week.

He clears his throat, brow furrowing like he's trying to focus, then frowns before speaking: ]

Hey -- if we're apologizing for stuff, I should prob'ly say sorry too. [ He drops his chin on his free hand, leans into his fingers so he can rub at his eyes, and then the view tilts to the ceiling. ] Sorry for all the. Like. Really bad nightmares. Couldn't help it but 's still bullshit. M'sorry.

[ He chews at the edge of his tongue, then -- yeah, that's enough. The feed is cut. ]

Comments

[onteamdyson]

[Thank everything! She moves closer, taking his hand in both of hers and just holding it. It's really hard to stay hopeful when Jesse's been gone this long and Galen looks like this and she's completely out of things to say that won't just make it that much worse.

So she just curls up next to him, not letting go of that hand. He'll talk when he's ready. Or they'll fall asleep. Or she'll be there if he has to vom. Whatever he needs. That's what best friends do!]

[gleans]

[ After a long silence, he finally mumbles something out: ] Don't even like drinking.

[onteamdyson]

[F-ffff, awwww, no, Galen! Augh. Her heart.] Then maybe you should have left it to the professionals! [A beat.] ... It doesn't really help. Trust me.

[gleans]

Mmmyeah, figured that out. [ Uuugh. ] Just wanted t'... pass out for a while.

[onteamdyson]

Pass out now. You can apologize to peeps later. I seriously doubt anyone's mad at you, Squishy, it's kind of impossible.

[gleans]

Just felt like shit. [ He had to say something, push off at least some of the terrible feeling. ] Least s'done now.

[onteamdyson]

Yeah. Good point.

[This is really depressing. She wants to know what he's thinking, even though she has a pretty damn good idea, but that would mean talking about it and that would make it more real. More final. The only thing that could possibly make this better is Jesse walking through that door and Kenzi can't give that to him and it's killing her.

She lifts their hands, shifting her grip so their fingers are entwined, and drapes her free arm over her stomach because she feels sick. It's gotta be so much worse for him.]

I'm sorry, Galen.

[gleans]

[ His eyes squeeze shut under his arm. He doesn't want to think about it, doesn't want to keep being reminded that Jesse is gone. ]

I dunno what t'do. M'just -- so fuckin' drained.

[onteamdyson]

Well, then I guess that's it. We might as well just give up because everything sucks and everything is terrible and we can't win. So what's the point, right? We'll just lay here and get really drunk until they science us to death or dinosaurs eat our faces or a bologna sandwich comes to life and smacks us in the face. We're throwing in the towel. Okay. Awesome. That settles it. I'm gonna go find some peanuts to snack on, do you want to drink bleach or set yourself on fire?

[Not trying to be mean. Just trying to make a point. She gives his hand a squeeze.] We have to deal with this eventually, you know. You've seen what happens when you don't talk about shit. You go all crazy like me and totally shut down anytime someone mentions you-know-who.

[gleans]

[ He seems to rein himself in a little, at that. Yeah, he's being stupid and miserable. ]

There's nothing t'talk about. He's dead, I feel like shit, the end.

[onteamdyson]

Yeah, but it's not the end, though. And he could still come back! There's been like... seven billion Natashas! Party came back once. He could still come back. I've been here so damn long and you know the one thing these bastards haven't taken from me yet? Hope.

[She sighs, rolling over on her side a little more towards him.] ... Just don't give up, Galen. Not yet.

[gleans]

[ He rolls over a teeny bit, careful not to breathe in her face, and squeezes her hand, then sort of peeks under his arm. His eyes are tired, a little bloodshot. ]

... Thanks, Kenz. 'M trying.

[onteamdyson]

[So. Much. Relief. She smiles sadly and squeezes back.]

Good. Go to sleep. Lucky for you, I come from a long line of Russian priestesses with the ability to be human dream catchers that kick bad stuff in the face before it can get near you. Promise I won't go anywhere, so just sleep.

[gleans]

[ He makes a little amused noise, then lifts her hand to kiss her fingers. It's a friendly gesture. ]

M'gonna give it a shot. Sorry in advance 'f I puke.