cape_kore | what is this / 01

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what is this / 01

[ The transmission starts off audio, a confused voice spluttering to itself as Stiles haplessly hits buttons on his communicator. ]

Okay, well, ya said Cape Kore like that means anything to me, but here's the thing, sucker, is that I've never been to a Cape Anything. --Who even lives near a cape, I'm not a cape kind of --

[ Video! It flips over and the face jumps and makes a few surprised shapes. ]

Well. Hello, guy. That just flashed. Nine-one-one? Hello? I'm, um. I'm not living here. There's been a mistake.

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Well, if he doesn't give it to you, you punch him. You don't stiff friends. [But punching them is fine!]

Oh, he's gonna pay up: there's a hot dude frickin' flirting with me!

[ Stiles does a single fist pump and then, probably, remembers where he is. ]

And I- was gonna be so cool until that moment.

Damn skippy! [He's not going to argue with the hot.] And being cool is overrated. You should aim for awesome instead.

[ That didn't put him off. THAT DIDN'T PUT HIM OFF, Stiles is so good right now. ]

On a cool scale of one to Clooney, I rate about, I dunno, Urkel. So awesome? I can do.

Clooney's overrated. I've always felt like more of a Daniel Day-Lewis or a Johnny Depp, myself.

Oh, totally. But suave like a motherfucker no matter which way you slice it.

You've got the Depp kinda hair. Plus he gets to be a pirate.

[He runs his hand through his hair. It is pretty awesome, isn't it?]

I always wanted to be a pirate, 'cept I can't swim all that great. Good thing I switched to superhero, right?

[ Stiles unconsciously mirrors him, fingers scrubbing into his own cropped hair. Or lack thereof. ]

Superhero beats pirate any day of the week. Pirates don't get phasers. [ He grins. ] Guess that rules you out on the skinny-dipping front 'round these parts.

Kinda cold for that, anyway, but if you wanna see me naked, all you gotta do is ask.

[ Suddenly choking, on absolutely nothing except maybe air. ]

That would be great. It. What? You're a pretty forward dude.

Hey, I just know what I like. [And it's sex. Who doesn't like a good time? Besides even if Stiles just wants to look, Kobra knows he looks good.]

[ He grins again, flattered or flabbergasted or something his face can't decide on. But his tone's a little self-deprecating when he speaks up again. ]

And that's weird new dudes you just met over the magical wristwatch phone?

[He shrugs.] Having a good time with good-looking people. Besides, you'd Lyds' friend, right? Totally not a stranger at all.

[ You need to stop calling Stiles attractive, Kobra, it's doing funny things to his face that he keeps having to try to repress. ]

[ Well, for a second or two, before, ] Hey, she didn't put you up to this, right?

No one tells me what to do. [It's such a lie. Lydia can order him around all she wants as long as they have sex again later.]

[ SUCH A LIE. Stiles just gives a small laugh. ]

If you haven't been told around at least once, then I am so not believing how well you know Lydia Martin.

Okay, Lydia tells me what to do.

A lot, actually. [But he totally doesn't have to listen!]

I choose to listen, 'cause she's smart and usually right.

Alright, there you go. That's more like the Lydia we all know and love. [ And follow and pine after since grade school and - ]

Just gotta figure out how to keep that dignity intact, but admitting it's the first half of the problem.

[He laughs.]

Look, when your options are dignity or sex with a beautiful lady, your dignity's not worth it.

[Life lessons from Kobra! Aww, yeah!]

Definitely not when it's sex on the ta- -- haaaaaable --

[ Once again, Stiles' mouth moving before his brain can catch up, and then suddenly it's as though Kobra's successfully punched him in the face rather than taught him such a VERY VALUABLE life lesson. ]

Sex, like, penis in- in the vajayjay, that kind of, sex. With Lydia.

[He just gives Stile a look. He's not sure what's worse, his shock or the fact that he just said "vajayjay".]

On second thought, I think I need to keep my clothes on around you.

That's not -

[ AND NOW HE'S STRIKING OUT, the disappointments continue to pile. Stiles' hands throw up into the air for a moment before he's back in frame. ]

My indignation pointed less at the sex and more so at the with Lydia portion of the- you know what, forget it. Congratulations on the getting laid.

Maybe she just has good taste.

[He smiles.] I am attractive and objectively awesome.

Well, okay, given and given! [ Even in rejection, cannot let up on these facts. Dammit. ] But she usually likes 'em, you know, a little more. Muscle-y. [ And less bright. ]

I've been scrawny all my life. I just know how to rock it.

[Honestly, he does know that he's attractive, but he'd been as surorised as anyone when Lyds had gone for it.]

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stiling - 2012-12-20 16:25 (UTC) - Expand

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goodluckkobra - 2012-12-21 04:22 (UTC) - Expand

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