001 | Video

[sellerofsins]

Huh. Well isn't this just nice and cosy? Not exactly where I want to be but isn't it always so delightful when someone intervenes with your busy day for their own amusement and drops you in the middle of fuck knows where?

[Meet Crowley. The annoyed looking man currently glaring into the camera. He doesn't know who you people are or what's going all, all he knows is that he probably hates you. All of you.]

Let me guess, this is somehow the Winchesters' fault? Always is, never a moments peace. Boys, boys, boys. Not in the mood to play today, I have better things to do. Forgive me if I don't plan to stick around.

So, if anyone out there can kindly point me to the nearest exit, I will be most grateful.

Comments

[ video ]

[noblexcompanion]

[ Well hello there, King of Hell, have a Ginger Goddess Welcoming Party. Or something. ]

There is no exit - at least, not one we can pick and choose when to use. Sorry. We're kinda stuck here.

As for the Winchesters? If you mean the tall guy and the gorgeous guy? Yeah... They're not here.

Video;

[sellerofsins]

[Oh goodie, just what he wanted!]

No exit? Wonderful. Not even a fire escape?

[No Winchesters? Well, miracles could happen. Who knew?] Can't say I'm heartbroken personally.

[ video ]

[noblexcompanion]

Well, you could try jumping in the ocean but you'd probably drown, or be eaten by sea monsters. [ She doesn't know if there are sea monsters, but it's possible. ]

Mad scientists pick us off one by one for experiments... or sommat. [ She doesn't really know the details and should probably be banned from welcoming the newbies... ]

video; Gmail ate this tag. WTF.

[sellerofsins]

Oh well it'd put out the fire at least. [He does look nor sound impressed.] Mad scientists? Right. Sounds like a Tuesday at work.

<3

[noblexcompanion]

Well, maybe not mad scientists, but people that like to poke around and do experiments - or torture, not entirely sure on the finer details.

[Video]

[bostonhowler]

I'm sorry sir. I arrived yesterday and people are saying that we can't leave. I haven't tried the woods yet.

video;

[sellerofsins]

The woods? Is that worth a try?

video;

[bostonhowler]

I'm unsure. Someone mentioned sabretooth tigers, and a few other impossible creatures. I haven't been there yet.

video;

[sellerofsins]

Really? Are they native or is someone just a rare creature collector?

[villainized]

[ Ah, familiar faces. How Lucifer doesn't enjoy seeing them. But he smiles into the camera like he and Crowley are old friends. ]

Leaving so soon?

[sellerofsins]

[Shit. There's a face he didn't exactly need nor want to see. Still, he just has to play it cool, seem neutral.]

Why stick around? I have considerably better and more interesting things to do.

[villainized]

Oh?

[ Lucifer's practically brimming with innocent curiosity. ]

Like what?

[sellerofsins]

[Is it hot in here? It feels hot. Hotter than hell.

Yes, he usurped his throne. But come on, Lucifer's minions ate his tailor. Line crossed.]

Holding down the fort after your grand exit.

video:

[charring]

Who are the Winchesters?

[This is an important question, see. Fuck the rest. The rest is unanswerable.]

video:

[sellerofsins]

Somewhat like the Hardy Boys on a more unique speciality and twice as annoying.

video:

[charring]

I got halfway through one Hardy Boys book and decided it wasn't worth my time. Smart as they're said to be, I don't think they're capable of kidnapping. But then, like I said, half of one book.

video:

[sellerofsins]

I've never actually read the book, it's just pop cul-- oh, forget it. [Seriously. Who cared? The books were for kids and he wasn't even a kid when they were released. He was selling souls around like knockoff DVDs.] They solve mysteries and they're annoying. Same sort of thing. And trust me, they're capable of a lot.

video

[hung_garian]

Everything is always the Winchesters' fault. End of.

video

[sellerofsins]

Everything bad, at least. They never know when to leave well enough alone.

Re: video

[hung_garian]

Yeah, you're telling me. Course, since by some miracle they're not actually here right now, you might wanna reconsider that.

video

[sellerofsins]

Just because they're not here and not involved doesn't mean I can't blame them. It's cathartic, helps my process till I find the morons responsible for this detour to the mystical version of Guantanamo Bay.

[goodluckkobra]

The Winchesters don't live here anymore. I think the're getting butt-probed by evil scientists.

[ He shrugs. Scientists, aliens. Same thing, right? ]

Are you a friend of theirs? 'Cause Dean's kind of a fuckin' dick and I would love to tell you why in detail if you've got the time.

[sellerofsins]

Ah, all good things come to those who wait.

[A little silver lining in this murky world.]

I wouldn't say friend but spare me your list, I have my own and I'm sure it's longer and vastly more detailed.

[goodluckkobra]

So are they like related or married?

[ Oh, he likes this guy. They have things in common and everything! ]

Am I not supposed to ask? 'Cause that just makes me wanna ask more.

[sellerofsins]

Brothers. But they could be more, never really looked into it nor wanted too.

[They act like a married couple... or more teenagers in love. Melodramatic and very hammy.]

Perhaps when I have more time, I'll write an essay on the subject and publish it. Might make for fun reading.